Guest Blogger: Ann Mayburn

By Kelly on December 18, 2013 in BDSM, Blog Tour, Erotica, Excerpt, Fantasy Romance, Guest Blogs

Top Ten Things to Look for in a Dom

Let me start off by saying that I truly, deeply admire you for stepping outside of your comfort zone and exploring your needs and sexuality. Kudos to you for having the strength to take that first step. 🙂 I talk with readers everyday who dream of finding a Dom like the ones I write about- you know, hot, hung, and sexual psychics like Ivan from ‘Ivan’s Captive Submissive’. That man could sell a ketchup Popsicle to a woman wearing white loves. Anyways, they potential submissives have these wonderful romantic fantasies about finding him and everything clicking into place, the planets going into alignment, and rainbows and firecrackers shooting from their ass in glee. Sadly, this isn’t always what happens. Outside the pages of a book everyone, even Doms, are human and have human eccentricities and failings that make us wonderful…and not so wonderful.

Before you start chatting with a stranger on Fetlife or attend your first local BDSM meet and greet it’s good to keep a few things in mind about your potential partner before you hand them the key to your heart.

Things to Look For

1) These apply to any potential suitor you meet, but they are so important that I have to include them here. You want a man with a job, a home, and a car. Shallow? Not really. If he can’t provide for himself he probably can’t provide for you either.

2) He is patient. Things won’t always go well inside and outside of the dungeon and you don’t want a man who loses his shit while your bound up and unable to defend yourself.

3) Maturity. This kinda ties in with number two. Mature men are just that, men, not little boys still trying to find their way in the world. This is not to say that every man that is fifty is going to be mature and every man who is twenty will be immature, but you want a Dom who has either had a bit of experience or is willing to learn along with you from an experienced Dom. There are tons of BDSM groups out there that will help you and your partner learn the ropes…get it…learn the ropes…-snork-

4) He loves you AND your life. A good Dom will never, ever, try to isolate you from the ones you love. While he may not adore your family the way you do, he will never try to remove them from your life and prevent contact. If he ever says ‘If you loved me you wouldn’t talk to xxx anymore’ run for the hills.

5) He is aware of the human body and its limitations. While most of us would love to be as limber as a Russian ballerina, we just aren’t. Your Dom should know about the dangers of restraints and how much damage can be done by tying or restraining you in certain positions for any amount of time.

6) He wants you inside and outside of the dungeon. Unless being a fuck toy is what you’re looking for make sure you see each other in the real world. Can you have dinner with him and not just sit and stare at your plate because your vegetables are more interesting to have a conversation with than he is? It’s easy to get caught up in the rush of a new relationship, but you can only have sex for so long before you have to talk.

7) He will never make you do things you don’t want to do. Ok, I’m not talking about pushing your limits or sticking his pinky in your butt when you said you didn’t think you liked anal sex. I’m talking about making you do things against your will that you don’t want to do. It is ok if sometimes you just don’t want to have sex or play in the dungeon. While in romance books the hero would pull some magical sexual elixir out of his ass and change your mind, in the real world you get sick, you get tired, and sometimes you just want to cuddle and be held. If he forces you to have sex and you say no and safeword out, that is rape.

8) He’ll be ok about taking things slow and getting to know each other before strapping you to the St. Andrew’s Cross. Just because you don’t drop to your knees and blow him at your first opportunity doesn’t make you a bad sub, it makes him an asshole. He should be interested in you, not just what you can do for him as a fuck toy. Even if you just want to be his fuck toy, make sure he sees you as a human being. One of the main personality traits in serial killers is that they don’t view people as people, but as objects. Don’t let anyone make you an object.

9) He has a sense of humor. Seriously, this is important. So much of life is filled with ‘you’re either going to laugh or cry’ moments and you want a man with you that is going to make you laugh. Fifty years down the road when gravity has taken that fine ass south a bit you’ll be glad you have a Dom who can still make you giggle.

10) Educated. I’m not saying that he has to hold a Masters degree, but you want a man who you can hold a conversation with. Intelligence is sexy and in BDSM essential. You want a Dom who is smart enough to push you when you need to be pushed, wise enough to back off and cuddle you when you need a cuddle, and intelligent enough to not bore you to tears when he isn’t fucking you. 😉

I hope this list has helped you a bit in your efforts to find a Dom. At the end of the day it’s just you and the man on the other side of the whip so make sure it is someone worthy of your submission. You are special, beautiful, and something to be cherished. You deserve a man who treats you as such. Now, let’s take a look at what the beauty of your submission means to a man who truly values his submissive.

Ivan’s Captive Submissive

Novel Length

Heat Level: Erotic w/ heavy BDSM elements

Contemporary BDSM Romance

Coming November 19th, 2013 from Fated Desires Publishing

When Gia Lopez signs up for the Submissive’s Wish Charity Auction she has no idea that she’s about to be bought by a Russian Dom who will do anything to make her fantasies come true. Including staging an elaborate kidnapping that Gia believes is real. Ivan is instantly drawn to Gia and he wants to be the best Master she’s ever had. As he spends time with Gia he begins to have intense feelings for the strong, independent, and sexy American woman. He’s only won a week of her service but wishes to keep her forever.

Unaware of Ivan’s true feelings, Gia fights her growing emotional attachment to him. All she wants is to settle down with a nice Dom in the United States, continue her career, and live a normal life. However, Ivan sets a plan into motion that will push Gia to all of her limits and take her on a global journey of self-discovery, extreme pleasure, and love.

Warning: Contains Erotic Spanking, Subspace, f/f situations, a devastatingly sexy Dom who knows what he wants, and a submissive who just might be ready to give him what he needs.

EXCERPT from ‘Ivan’s Captive Submissive’

Making a low, hungry growl, Ivan came onto the bed and grabbed her ankle, hauling her towards him as if she weighed no more than the pillows surrounding her. Without preamble, he shoved her legs open, his broad shoulders stretching her wide. The soft, warm brush of his lips against her inner thigh had her moaning softly and she abandoned herself to his touch, letting him do whatever he wanted to her. It wasn’t like she had much of a choice…or that’s what she told herself when guilt at her lack of resistance tried to intrude on the moment. She ground her pussy against his mouth and he nipped her labia hard enough to hurt.

He smiled at her pained moan and looked up at her. “You have such a beautiful cunt. My cunt.”

He nuzzled the mound of her pubic bone, rubbing the stubble of his chin against her in an altogether pleasurable manner. Her ass burned and she shifted, trying to get more comfortable. Making a displeased sound he slapped her thigh.

“Be still.”

She froze. Then, unable to help herself, she arched as his mouth sealed on her swollen sex. He could hold her pussy in his mouth all at once, and his touch felt sinfully good. He didn’t tease or nibble, instead, he ate her with an aggression that curled her toes. He began to suckle that tender bundle of nerves, driving her crazy. She moaned and thrashed beneath his onslaught, unable to control her own body. His licks gentled, becoming soothing strokes that only served to drive her higher.

“Master, please, you feel so good. May I come?”

He didn’t lift his mouth from her sex, only shook his head. She groaned in frustration and curled her legs around his shoulders, drawing him closer. Setting her heels against his back, she began to rock her pelvis against his greedy mouth, moaning with abandon as he began to press his thick tongue into her sheath. Her pussy clamped down on him, and when he pulled away, she moaned in distress.

Sitting back on the bed, he began to unbuckle his pants, then paused and looked at her where she was writhing against the comforter, her legs scissoring in an effort to alleviate the muscle-clenching need he’d unleashed in her. Damn, give the man five minutes eating her pussy, and she was ready to do anything and everything he wanted. Feeling wanton, she crawled across the bed towards him and sat back on her heels with her thighs spread, giving him an unimpeded view of her wet sex.

“How may I serve you, Master?”

He smiled, a slight dimple deepening next to his mouth that she hadn’t seen before. “I want you to ride me, dorogaya.”

Sliding out of his pants, he turned his hip so she couldn’t get a good view of his cock.

Bastard.

“Close your eyes and do not open them until you are about to come.”

Confused, she did as he asked, feeling very vulnerable without her sight to aid her. A moment later the bed shifted, and with a gentle touch, he pulled her along with him until the crisp hair of his thighs tickled against her. His warm scent enveloped her and she yearned to feel his body pinning hers to the bed.

“Lift your leg.”

She did as he commanded and he grasped her hips, moving her onto his lap as easily as a doll. A moment later, she heard the foil of a condom wrapper tear. When he pulled her closer the hard, very thick length of him rubbed against her slit and belly.

Dear God, the man was hung like a bull, too.

“Grasp my cock and put it inside of you, slowly. You have no choice. I am your Master and you will obey me.”

She groaned and reached between them, her senses heightened by her lack of sight. The smooth, spongy tip of his dick sheathed in latex met her questing fingertips and he tensed beneath her, already hard muscle turning to steel. She’d love to look at him right now, to see his expression and know if she was pleasing him. As messed up as it was, she wanted to make him feel good.

Lifting herself slightly, she rubbed the thick head of his erection back and forth through her slit, lubricating him and driving both of them crazy. He had much better patience than she did, because not once did he try to shove into her or jerk her down on him. Instead, he let her play and tease until she was panting.

Unfulfilled need made her aggressive, wanting him in deep right now. She placed the head of his cock against her sheath and prepared to slam herself down on him. He was thick, very thick, and it would hurt, but, fuck, she needed him to fill her. To give her an anchor to hold onto as she floated in the dark depths of her mind.

Before she could sheathe him, he gripped her hips and held her immobile, poised over his body.

Holy shit, he was strong.

Ever so slowly he lowered her until the fat mushroom cap of the head of his cock rubbed just inside of her entrance. The sensation almost had her eyes rolling back her head and she gasped. With a pleased rumble he lowered her a little more, now almost halfway inside of her. Then he pulled almost all the way back out and she groaned in frustration.

“Beg for it, my beautiful girl.”

“Oh God, Master, please fuck me. Please fill me up with your cock, ease the ache that you’ve left in my body. I want to come with you inside of me, I want to feel you all over me, surrounding me. I’ve been good, please.” She squeezed down her vaginal muscles, saying a thank you to kegel exercises, and delighted in his growl. “I want to milk that big dick of yours while you come inside of me.”

She braced her hands on his chest and he removed his hands from her hips. “You please me very much, my Gia. Show me the beauty of your willing submission.”

About the Author

Ann is Queen of the Castle to her wonderful husband and three sons in the mountains of West Virginia. In her past lives she’s been an Import Broker, a Communications Specialist, a US Navy Civilian Contractor, a Bartender/Waitress, and an actor at the Michigan Renaissance Festival. She also spent a summer touring with the Grateful Dead-though she will deny to her children that it ever happened.

From a young age she’s been fascinated by myths and fairytales, and the romance that often was the center of the story. As Ann grew older and her hormones kicked in, she discovered trashy romance novels. Great at first, but she soon grew tired of the endless stories with a big wonderful emotional buildup to really short and crappy sex. Never a big fan of purple prose, throbbing spears of fleshy pleasure and wet honey pots make her giggle, she sought out books that gave the sex scenes in the story just as much detail and plot as everything else-without using cringe worthy euphemisms. This led her to the wonderful world of Erotic Romance, and she’s never looked back.

Now Ann spends her days trying to tune out cartoons playing in the background to get into her ‘sexy space’ and has learned to type one handed while soothing a cranky baby.

Website http://www.annmayburn.com/

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ann.mayburn.5

Twitter https://twitter.com/AnnMayburn